Moleman's Epic Rap Battles NEWS (Special #2)Moleman's Epic Rap Battles NEWS (Special #2) by MolemanNineThousand
••• SCRIPT/LYRICS: •••
(*Intro music: "Hail to the Chief" by The Four Squeezins*)
The Once-ler: Salutations, gentlemen, ladies and assorted Seussian monstrosities.
This is history's most inexplicably likable…
(*Hexxus is shown*)
…Second-most-inexplicably likable harbinger of mass-deforestation, the Once-ler speaking; hold your applause now, Tumblrites.
While I'm neither attempting to build and maintain an industrial empire with zero foresight regarding resource depletion nor hiding myself away in shame over the destruction I've caused because I, again, apparently have no idea how to keep a resource that quite literally grows on trees renewable, I watch two shows: Game of Thrones and Gotham… oh, and House of Cards.
Also, some little wrinkly guy has paid me to advertise his own crappy series, Moleman's Epic Ra-
…Wait a minu
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